One-night-stands and short-term affairs are more common than long-term affairs. According to one study, about 50% of these extramarital affairs last between one month to a year. Long-term affairs may last for 15 months or more. About 30% of the affairs last about three years or more. So, the next time you are at the receiving end of your partner’s betrayal, don’t think you are alone.
11 Tell-Tale Signs He Will Cheat In The Future
Relationships are very fragile. You need to constantly maintain them with love and care. If you are looking for signs he will cheat in the future, then he must have already cheated on you once, or you are just suspicious because he is acting a little odd. Whatever the reason is, your humble writer is here to help you out. Pop singer, Lady Gaga, once said, “Trust is like a mirror, you can fix it if it’s broken, but you can still see the crack in its reflection.” As much as you rely on your partner, it’s ultimately on you to protect your well-being and your precious heart. Read the pointers below and find out if your partner is cheating on you or not.
1. He puts no effort in the relationship
This is one of the obvious signs he will cheat in the future. If you want to maintain a relationship, you need to put in equal effort. At the onset of the relationship, he might have bent over backward to meet you, take you on a date, and to tell you how much he loves you. But now, there’s no effort in the relationship from his side. He seldom agrees to go out on dates. You don’t spend quality time together. You don’t see the relationship moving forward. It’s static and you feel like there’s something missing. This could mean that he has no intention of continuing the relationship. Maybe he has already started looking elsewhere. If you have a gut feeling your partner is cheating, then perhaps you are right, considering his zero enthusiasm toward keeping the relationship alive.
2. He hasn’t deleted any of the dating apps
What’s the use of dating apps? To meet new people, go on dates with them, and if their vibes match, then possibly start a romantic relationship. If the two of you are exclusive, then this is one of the signs he is talking to someone else or he will cheat in the future or that he is already cheating on you. Confront him about this and ask him to delete those apps if the two of you are committed. Some people are sly. They might delete those apps but they won’t delete their profile. I can say this because I’ve been there. My former boyfriend very confidently showed me his phone and said, “Look, I’ve deleted the apps.” Later, a friend told me that she saw his profile on Tinder; he was pretty active there. Be smart about it especially if you have a gut feeling your partner is cheating on you.
3. Signs he will cheat in the future — He is overprotective about his phone
If your partner doesn’t even let you take a peek at his phone, then you have something to worry about. What is he so afraid of? Yes, he could be watching porn or he could be planning a surprise birthday party for you. But you can’t be sure about that. If you want to know how to catch a cheating partner, then find out if he has recently changed his password or if he hesitates to tell you those 4 digits. When you knew each other’s passwords before, why is he hiding it now? This is one of the alarming signs he will cheat in the future or is cheating on you already. It’s not just his phone he is protective about. He won’t let you touch his iPad, laptop, or any other gadget which can hold information. You should go with your gut feeling and consider it as one of the signs he is talking to someone else. I am not asking you to invade his personal space and check his phone. If he is honest and has nothing to hide, he won’t mind you using his phone once in a while, right?
4. He is an excellent liar
Did he lie he was with his friends and you found out through other sources that he wasn’t actually with them? Did he tell you he was going on a work trip but there was no such trip planned in the first place? A relationship is built on love, trust, and honesty. When there’s no honesty from his side, you can’t expect loyalty either. The signs of a lying spouse won’t be apparent in the beginning but they can’t keep lying to you and think they will get away with it. It doesn’t matter what kind of lies he is telling. Lying in a relationship is toxic as it decreases the level of trust one partner has on the other. Not only that, the person who is being lied to experiences a lot of emotional and mental turmoil. They might begin to doubt every word that comes out of their partner’s mouth.
5. Tries to gaslight you
Gaslighting is emotional abuse. It’s a tactic to assert power and control over the other person. At the heart of it, gaslighting inflicts emotional damage on a person. Your partner is trying to undermine your reality and gut feeling by denying truths and facts. He will use gaslighting phrases in the relationship to try and distort your reality. I experienced gaslighting on a major level and had a very hard time coming out of it. It’s horrible and nobody should ever go through this. If there is even the faintest suspicion that your partner is trying to twist facts and make you doubt yourself, run away from the relationship. It is one of the signs he will cheat in the future.
6. He doesn’t share his future plans
If he is serious about you, he would tell you about his future plans. Things like where he wants to live, whether he wants to start a new business in the future, or when he wants to get married. If he dodges such questions and runs away from such conversations, it could be one of the signs he will cheat in the future.
7. He has kept you a secret
This is something I realized long after my former partner and I broke up. He always kept me a secret. Whenever I asked him to introduce me to his friends and family, he would ignore my pleas. He would give me reasons to keep the relationship private as it will camouflage us from scrutiny and gossip. Furthermore, he would avoid meeting my friends as well. He insisted on keeping the relationship private because he wanted to “protect it”. Those were nothing but lies. If you’re both committed, ask him to introduce you to his friends or any of his siblings, if not parents. If he is serious about you, he would do it without thinking twice.
8. He has lost his sexual libido
If he isn’t fulfilling his sexual desires with you, he could already be with someone else. If he ignores you when you try to build a sexual atmosphere, it is one of the signs he will cheat in the future or he is already cheating on you. Some of the other signs include him not taking showers with you anymore. He will stop undressing in front of you as well. He could be hiding nail marks or love bites from you. If you have a gut feeling partner is cheating on you, then don’t ever ignore that feeling.
9. He is inconsistent with you
An inconsistent partner will act unpredictable. They have mood swings and will act hot and cold with you. Their push and pull behavior will leave you confused. They will withhold their love for you or it could also be that they have fallen out of love. But don’t worry, if he is actually having an affair with someone else, then there are many ways cheaters are caught. It’s his arrogance that’s making him think his infidelity won’t come to light. If your boyfriend is inconsistent with you, it is one of the signs he will cheat in the future. He takes a lot of time to reply to your messages. He could be busy, but a consistent partner will let you know that they are busy and will get back later. He could have lost interest in you and doesn’t feel the need to check in on you.
10. He has cheated before
Look at your partner’s relationship history. He could have cheated once with his former partner. But if that has always been his pattern, then that’s worrisome. Has he never been loyal in any of his relationships? Has he been disloyal with you as well? If that’s the case, then you may be right about your gut feeling that your partner is cheating on you. In my previous relationship, I was the “other woman”. I found out later that he was already in a relationship when he started going out with me. He was still with his girlfriend when he confessed his love for me. I went through a lot of emotional turmoil and other psychological effects of being the other woman. The guilt washed over me and it took a lot of time to get over it.
11. He is still in touch with his ex
There’s nothing wrong with being friends with one’s ex. But if your partner is still in touch with his former partner and acts strange around you every time he meets them, then there are chances he still has feelings for them. It’s one of the signs he is not over his ex. You need to find out if he has always been in touch with his ex from the time they broke up or he started talking to them recently. If it’s the latter, then it could be one of the signs he will cheat in the future. Before you conclude that he is cheating on you, look at these signs. If you can resonate with a few of the above mentioned points, then start gathering evidence. Make sure you have all the information you need that won’t let him escape the truth this time. Don’t give him a chance to cook up stories. But my suggestion is, leave him. You deserve a love that’s whole, true, and pure.