If you are emotional and sensitive, then healing the heartbreak is a big, mammoth task. Yes, the pain is real and grieving a breakup is not just a dramatized version of a sob story. Apart from depression, loss of appetite and physical exhaustion, a breakup can also lead you to suffer through serious withdrawal symptoms, as you are addicted to love. But worry not. The breakup turf may look difficult but it also has the ability to help you evolve as a person. So many people around the world not only go through and survive breakups but also emerge from it stronger than before. You too can make a comeback by healing your broken heart. But before that, let us first ponder over a relationship breakup and probable reasons for heartbreak.
What Is A Breakup: Breakup Meaning
A relationship breakup is a process to put an end to a romantic affair, courtship or committed relationship Simply put, a breakup is the difference between ‘in a relationship’ and ‘being single’! Apart from a few extremely lucky people, most young adults have experienced the effects of breakup in their lives. Whether it happens because of lack of compatibility, infidelity or anything else, breakups have become an extremely frequent occurrence in today’s world. But why is our generation so prone to it? Are they commitment-phobic or do they want different things in life? To understand the psychology behind this, we need to first understand why we fall in love. We all are wired to find the love of our lives. Since childhood, the stories of Prince Charming or Dream Girl nurture our desire to love and be loved. One of our adulthood challenges, besides a stable career, is to find the love of our life to give a new meaning to our lives. In this pursuit, we hold on to a relationship to the point of being consumed. When the reality hits in the form of heartache, it becomes difficult for many people to accept it. How to deal with heartbreak becomes a constant nagging question weighing on our minds. It becomes unbearably tough to face the cluster of difficult feelings, including rejection. Now, we as humans can’t handle rejection well, unless we’re prepared for it. And a breakup is rejection in its most extreme form that affects our existence on the whole. Sometimes, the question of how a partner could reject you brings out the egoistic side, making it difficult to accept separation and move on.
Sadness And Grief After A Breakup
So, what happens when you go through a breakup? Do you feel happy for your newly found singlehood, or do you isolate yourself from the rest of the world and cry your heart out? If you’re looking for real breakup advice, the answer depends on what kind of a person you are. It also depends on how invested you were in the relationship. Was it a casual relationship or did you think it would last forever? Another important factor to consider is who broke up with whom. Did you dump your partner or get dumped? Different people handle a breakup in different ways. For many, it takes considerable time to get over grieving, no matter the reasons for the breakup. The hurt caused by heartbreak might trigger you to get back together with your ex in an attempt to reconcile and salvage the relationship. However, that rarely ever works out in the long run. So, a better option is to treat a breakup as a phase and deal with it. Acceptance is the only way in which you can successfully conquer the grieving after a split.
Reasons For Breakup, Effects of Breakup, Breakup Advice
If it’s all so complicated, why do people break up in the first place? Again the reasons vary widely from couple to couple. Couples may break up due to lack of compatibility or because they’ve fallen out of love and drifted apart. There are other valid and straightforward reasons that result in ending a relationship permanently. Let us try and understand some of the most reasonable grounds quoted while breaking up with someone.
5 most probable reasons for breakups in couples
Now that we’ve understood the breakup meaning, let’s take a look at some of most probable reasons for breakup among couples:
How do I get over a breakup?
Recovering from a breakup may take its own course of time. However, sound breakup advice can help you bounce back in life stronger than ever. Accept the emptiness from within, share your feelings with a friend, or pour your heart out in a journal. Feel your feelings; give them an outlet to move past the breakup. Cut off all contact- stop stalking your ex on social media, or sending texts and emails. You will need this ‘me-time’ for emotional clarity. Challenge your negative thoughts and divert your energies by keeping yourself busy at work. Spend your weekends volunteering for a social cause. Your heart will thank you for the healing. Break the cycle of pain and worries and use this breakup as an opportunity to set out on your own. Work on your hobbies and interests to feel better and more confident. Travel. Go places. Participate in adventure sports to feel alive and free. Look out for a promising future and as time goes by, you will feel better, and eventually, you will get over the dreaded breakup soon.
Breaking up with someone you love
Now, this is not an easy task. The effects of a breakup are overwhelming and can be long-lasting if not handled well, especially for those who strongly believe that ‘love will conquer all the odds.’ But many times, love and affection alone are not enough to sustain a relationship. You need other reasons like happiness, compatibility, peace of mind, comfort and mutual understanding to be in a longstanding relationship. When these facets of quality life go missing, a conscious call to overcome this so-called gloom of life is to break up and move on. When you are breaking up with someone you love, it is better to discuss changing priorities face-to-face. Instead of blaming them, tell them you want your own time and space. Or that you need to think about your future. First, there would be denial, shock and disbelief that they didn’t see a breakup coming their way. But remember, this decision will be in both of your best interests and your ex will eventually thank you for this hard step. Help them accept the truth through an open and honest conversation. Your reasons for breakup are valid. Maybe your priorities are different, or you were feeling miserable because of this relationship. Maybe this courtship will not lead anywhere. Talking openly will help you both move on and break up more amicably. Having received a newfound perspective and clarity about breakups, we hope now you will be able to deal with it in a clear and mature way. But still, if you are finding it difficult to move on, do not hesitate to contact our Bonobology counselors for personalized guidance on how to handle and overcome a breakup.